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Just One Thing |
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Simple Practices for Resilience and Happiness from
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DR. RICK HANSON
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If you're feeling anxious, afraid, or worried lately you may want to check out my mini-course on Dealing with Anxiety. You'll learn 5 of my favorite practices for feeling calmer, safer, and more capable.
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What do you do when the bottom falls out? |
THE PRACTICE: |
Take Heart. |
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— Why? — |
It takes heart to live in even ordinary times.
By “taking heart,” I mean several related things:
- Sensing your heart and chest
- Finding encouragement in what is good both around you and inside you
- Resting in your own warmth, compassion, and kindness; resting in the caring for you from others; love flowing in and love flowing out
- Being courageous, whole-hearted and strong-hearted – going forward wisely, even when anxious, knowing your own truth and, as you can, speaking it
When you take heart, you’re more able to deal with challenges like aging, illness, trauma, or conflicts with others. You’re also more able to take advantage of opportunities with confidence and grit.
Additionally, it takes heart to live in, live with, and live beyond times that are really hard. Your personal hard time might be bad news about your health, the death of a parent, or betrayal by others. Or it could be related to changes in your country and world, and your concerns about their effects on others and yourself; I’ve written about the importance of finding and facing facts at the level of society (feel free to skip it if you don’t want my take on politics).
There are so many examples of honorable people facing great difficulty with dignity, principle, and courage. They did it. We can, too.
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— How? — |
Start by riding out the storm. When big things happen at any scale – in your child’s schoolyard or in a refugee camp on the other side of the world – it is completely natural and normal to be shocked and disturbed by them.
As best you can, stay with the raw experience, the body sensations, the deep feelings, the stirred up fears and anger and perhaps paralysis. Whatever it is, it is your experience; some may be upset about a big event while others may be glad about it; I am definitely not trying to talk you out of your experience. Be mindful of whatever is passing through the big open space of awareness, observing it without being flooded by it. Painful and counterintuitive as it may be, this is the foundation of releasing really hard experiences and replacing them gradually and authentically with thoughts and feelings that are helpful, wholesome, wise, and even happy.
Do things that help you come back to center and find your footing. Personally, I prioritize exercise, sleep, and meditation; I try to feel the truth of being basically alright right now, in this moment, moment after moment (alongside and deeper than pain or sorrow); I do the dishes and make the bed. Walk the dog, call a friend, eat something, look at trees and sky, get a cup of tea and stare into space. Take good care of your body.
Guard and guide your attention. It’s one thing to find facts and form the best plans you can. It’s another thing to get distracted or upset by news or other people that do not add any useful value.
Take heart in the good that is real. Outside you, there is the kindness in others, the beauty of a single leaf, the stars that still shine no matter what hides them. Right now as you read, all over the world children are laughing in delight, families are sitting down to a meal, babies are being born, and loving arms are holding people who are dying. Inside you, there is your compassion, sincere efforts, sweet memories, capabilities – and much more. Take heart with others, sharing worries, support, and friendship.
Do the things you can. The more that events are turbulent, alarming, and beyond your influence, the more important it is to grow stability, safety, and agency inside you and around you.
Have courage. At all human scales, strong forces have always tried to confuse and frighten others. Whatever outward action is necessary, you can preserve an inner freedom, never cowed or bowed in your core.
Last, I’ve found it really helps to have perspective. Without minimizing one bit of whatever is awful, it is also true that humans like you and I have been walking this earth for nearly 300,000 years. I see the trees, the land, the ocean – all of it here before me and lasting long after me. Empires rise and fall. Sometimes the center does not hold – in a body, marriage, or nation – and still. And still people love each other, go out of their way for a stranger, and marvel at a rainbow. Nothing, nothing at all can change this. We keep putting one foot in front of the other one, lifting each other up along the way.
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Know someone who could use this reminder to take heart? |
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NEW ON THE BEING WELL PODCAST
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Relationship Mailbag: Finding Yourself, Boundaries, and Attachment |
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Dr. Rick and Forrest answer listener questions focused on navigating relationship challenges. They explore finding yourself after a codependent relationship, distinguishing between healthy and unhealthy desires, maintaining friendships after romantic feelings emerge, overcoming self-consciousness in social interactions, and communicating effectively during stress responses. Whether you’re healing from a breakup, working through attachment issues, or seeking to build more authentic connections, this episode offers practical advice.
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Check out the Episode
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RESOURCES FOR
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Navigating Political Turmoil |
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Not too surprisingly, I've been receiving a lot of questions lately about how to deal with everything going on in the political landscape in the United States and around the world. With that in mind, I've put together this page of free resources to offer some guidance during these challenging times and hope you find it useful.
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Check It Out
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NEW FROM THE WEDNESDAY MEDITATIONS + TALKS
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What to Do If You’re Feeling Disgusted |
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Disgust is a normal, human emotion. So last week I offered a live talk that explored ways to recognize and work with these intense emotions constructively. I also led a guided meditation on Settling into a Sense of Being Innately Good, and I hope you'll check it out.
If you haven't yet, sign up to join me every week for this free, live offering.
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Check It Out
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MORE GOOD STUFF
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SCIENCE NEWS (VIEW ARCHIVE HERE)
A recent study from the University of Tennessee found that weather-dependent renewable energy systems, such as wind and solar, are not more likely to cause severe blackouts during extreme weather compared to traditional power systems, putting a little more wind in the sails of renewable energy.
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FOR PARENTS
Parents profoundly influence the skills their children develop with getting what they want, the experiences and expectations they have around wanting, and the fundamental values and aims their children acquire. Therefore, skillfully responding to child wants are the foundation of a lifetime of success and satisfaction with our wishes, hopes, and dreams.
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FREE SUMMIT - THE POWER OF LOVE
If you'd like to deepen your connections, heal old wounds, and find joy in love again, you may want to check out the Power of Love free summit from my friends at Wisdom for Life. It started yesterday, but runs through November 12.
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POSITIVE NEUROPLASTICITY
PositiveNeuroplasticity.com provides resources and real-life accounts for using positive brain change in your everyday life. Classes and one-on-one counselling are also
available to deepen your learning.
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HAVE YOU READ IT YET?
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Neurodharma |
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New Science, Ancient WIsdom, and Seven Practices of the Highest Happiness. Available in Hardcover, Paperback eBook, and Audiobook, wherever books are sold.
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Get Your Copy
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WORDS OF WISDOM
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"Bullies draw power from the grievances of others; address those grievances and reduce the bully’s power." |
— RICK HANSON, PHD
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JUST ONE THING (JOT) is the free newsletter that suggests a simple practice each week for more joy, more fulfilling relationships, and more peace of mind. A small thing repeated routinely adds up over time to produce big results.
Just one thing that could change your life.
(© Rick Hanson, 2024)
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