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Just One Thing |
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Simple Practices for Resilience and Happiness from
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DR. RICK HANSON
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As we move toward the end of the year, I want to make it a little easier to grow the inner strengths that help us meet life with more calm, contentment, and love.
So now through December 2nd, all of my online courses are 50% off.
If you’ve been wanting to feel more supported day-to-day, deepen your practice, or simply return to your center, this is a great chance to begin.
And these courses also make meaningful gifts — the kind that actually help someone feel more resilient, more grounded, and more at peace in the year ahead.
You can see my full list of courses, here.
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What do others give you?
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THE PRACTICE: |
Say Thanks. |
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— Why? — |
What do you feel when someone thanks you for something? For a comment in a meeting, a task done at home, an extra step taken, an encouraging word.
You probably feel seen, appreciated, that you matter to the other person. Maybe a little startled, maybe wondering if you really deserve it, but also glad. Personally, this is how it is for me.
Turning it around, when you say "thank you" to someone, it is a small moment with big ripples: a confirmation of deep and wonderful truth, that we all depend on each other, that we are all joined - across dinner tables and the world - in a web whose threads are innumerable acts of giving.
For example, often when I eat a meal, I’ll take a moment to imagine the details of how that tomato or rice was grown and then transported onto my plate, including the people who walked the fields to plant and eventually pick it, and the man or woman who drove the truck that carried it to the store where I bought it. Those folks do not know me, but they’re real people, working hard, hoping for a good life, worrying about the people they love, extending themselves in their jobs, giving me something extra, all this woven into the food that’s entering my blood, my bones: thank you.
You can’t possibly say thank you to everything you’re given. No one can. So, when you do say thanks, it’s a token of your appreciation for the larger whole, joining you with that whole. It will make you happy to open to the giving coming your way each day.
And in giving thanks to the people in your life, you open the door to receiving their thanks in turn. In your home or company, a nice circle, a step toward a culture of gratitude.
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— How? — |
For starters, it's hard to give thanks if you're uncomfortable acknowledging that you have received something. Perhaps you don't want to feel indebted, or don't want to look needy. Maybe it's simply embarrassing. These feelings are normal - but they can sure get in the way of being thankful.
To deal with them, begin by naming them to yourself: squirmy . . . embarrassed . . . resentful . . . awkward . . . don’t want to owe anyone anything . . . Hold them in a big open space of awareness, like dark clouds in a vast sky. Don’t fight them, but gently move your attention away from them, back to your breathing and to a basic sense of being alright as a body . . . bringing to mind a sense of being cared about by someone . . . recognizing some of your good intentions in life . . . knowing one or more benefits to you of saying thanks . . . knowing what the other person has given you . . . feeling a simple sense of appreciation . . . feeling that it’s alright to be thankful . . . making it OK in your mind to
express thanks.
And then be straightforward and simple and say "Thank you" in whatever way is natural.
Many thank you's involve little things in the flow of life, like thanking someone for passing the salt at dinner. Let these small moments matter to you. Feel your thanks in your chest and throat. When you say your thanks, try to let them show in your eyes. Life is made up of moments, beads on a golden chain; what are you stringing together? As they say in Tibet: "If you take care of the minutes, the years will take care of themselves."
Also, consider where you might have a backlog of thanks, perhaps for some big things like saying thanks to your parents or other relatives, to old friends and new ones, to teachers and coaches of all kinds. Thanks to lovers and mates, children, pets, neighbors - even people you have never met, even the whole natural world. A wonderful and powerful practice is to make a list of people you want to thank directly and then gradually move through the list. You can also certainly offer thanks in your imagination, such as to people who are no longer living, to people far away, to groups of people, to specific animals or nature in general, or spiritual beings or forces if that is meaningful to you.
Throughout, it is very sweet to be thankful for the opportunity to give thanks.
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Know someone who could practice gratitude more?
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Share this Just One Thing practice with them!
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NEW ON THE BEING WELL PODCAST
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Dr. Becky on Becoming the Person (and Parent) You Needed |
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Dr. Becky Kennedy joins Forrest for a conversation about building better relationships, with ourselves, our partners, and our children. They talk about Dr. Becky’s framework of “good inside,” and how we can apply it to ourselves. Dr. Becky explains how many of the struggles parents face trace back to their own childhood experiences, and suggests how we can reparent ourselves by learning emotional regulation, working with shame, and becoming sturdier. They also cover the limits of behavioral control models, deeply feeling kids, maintaining boundaries when things get hard, and building connection
capital.
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| Check out the Episode
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NEW FROM THE WEDNESDAY MEDITATIONS + TALKS
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Releasing Anxiety with Three Kinds of Insights |
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Last week I offered a live meditation on Feeling Grounded, Loving, and at Peace, followed by a talk on Releasing Anxiety with Three Kinds of Insights, and I hope you'll check it out.
If you haven't yet, sign up to join me every week for this free, live offering.
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| Check It Out
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MORE GOOD STUFF
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SCIENCE NEWS (VIEW ARCHIVE HERE)
If humans want to live on other planets for the long haul, we'll have to bring agriculture of some kind with us, but most Earth life struggles in space conditions - except moss, which does particularly well.
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FOR PARENTS
Parenthood is a long, demanding marathon of love and growth that requires pacing, self-care, realistic expectations, and support to find meaning and joy through the years of relentless challenges and evolving stages.
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POSITIVE NEUROPLASTICITY
PositiveNeuroplasticity.com provides resources and real-life accounts for using positive brain change in your everyday life. Classes and one-on-one counselling are also
available to deepen your learning.
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STRUGGLING WITH ANXIETY?
I'm offering a NEW, LIVE, 12-week course in 2026 that will help you finally get a handle on your anxiety — so you can calm your body, clear your mind, and rebuild confidence from the inside out. Check it out!
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HAVE YOU READ IT YET?
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Making Great Relationships |
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Learn 50 simple practices for solving conflicts, building connection, and fostering love. Available in Hardcover, Paperback eBook, and Audiobook, wherever books are sold.
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| Get Your Copy
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WORDS OF WISDOM
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"In giving thanks to the people in your life, you open the door to receiving their thanks in turn." |
— RICK HANSON, PHD
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JUST ONE THING (JOT) is the free newsletter that suggests a simple practice each week for more joy, more fulfilling relationships, and more peace of mind. A small thing repeated routinely adds up over time to produce big results.
Just one thing that could change your life.
(© Rick Hanson, 2024)
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