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Just One Thing |
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Simple Practices for Resilience and Happiness from |
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DR. RICK HANSON |
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I'm proud to be a part of the Global Compassion Coalition's FREE Intergenerational Healing Summit, happening July 28th - August 1st.
Across generations, patterns of pain, disconnection, and unhealed trauma can be unknowingly passed down. But so can strength, wisdom, and compassion.
This summit is your invitation to break the cycle — and create a more connected, compassionate legacy for yourself and those who follow. |
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What helps you carry your load? |
THE PRACTICE: |
Give Over to Good. |
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— Why? — |
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In every moment, you and I and everyone and everything else – from quantum foam to fleeting thoughts, intimate relationships, rainforest ecosystems, and the stars themselves – are each a kind of standing wave, like the ever-changing though persistent pattern of water rising above a boulder in a river.
We are the result of multiple causes flowing through us. As Buckminster Fuller famously said, “I seem to be a verb.”
This fact is amazing, but both modern physics and deep ecology corroborate it. We can get silly-cosmic about it (done this myself – not only as a college sophomore!), but the implications are very down to earth.
As unique standing waves, you and I are constructed each moment by the currents – the forces and factors, both internal and external – flowing through us. We have no choice about being lived by these currents, continually given over to them.
But we can choose to give ourselves over to the good ones.
By “good,” I mean that which leads to happiness and benefit for you and others; “bad” means the opposite. (Of course, honesty about what is actually turning out to be truly good is important; history holds many cautionary tales about people giving themselves over to things they thought were good – e.g., Nazism – but weren’t.)
Giving over to good means relaxing into, opening to, being buoyed and guided by things like your own naturally good heart, the impulse to take the high road, love, compassion, vitality, courage, the longing for justice, and the wisdom and support of good friends.
Then your life’s wave becomes simpler, happier, and more beneficial. |
— How? — |
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There are two steps: knowing what the “good” is for you and then giving yourself over to it.
So, first step: what’s the good that would serve you to give yourself over to these days? In your mind, on paper, or talking with a friend, make a list for yourself. Probably it won’t be long. Listen to your inner knowing of what the good is for you. If appropriate, open to counsel from others (e.g., parent, friend, therapist, I Ching, prayer), but don’t let anyone push their view on you.
Your list might include self-nurturance, the peacefulness of nature, more self-expression, a long-deferred dream, sobriety, inner strength, certain health practices, meditation, the needs of your temperament, the simple truth that a particular job/career/relationship is not right for you, or the wisdom of your body that knows when it’s full and needs no more food for now.
For what it’s worth, these “goods” have been important for me personally to give over to lately: the need for true down-time . . . self-soothing . . . the love and loyalty of friends . . . an underlying deeply peaceful sense of truly being nothing but a standing wave and that’s alright . . .
Next, the second step: pick one of the good currents you’ve identified, and open to it in your mind and body. Relaxing, receiving, surrendering to it . . . notice how this feels. Try to find pleasure, ease, and comfort in this current. Notice any reluctance to being carried by this force for good in your life, and then see if you can let that reluctance pass away.
Imagine letting this good live you . . . what would that be like? What might change for the better – for you and others? Let the impact of those positive changes land in your mind; let yourself sense their rewards; let yourself become more motivated to lean toward them.
Then, for the next minute, hour, or day, focus on this one good thing and giving yourself over to it. In effect, “willpower” becomes redefined as yielding: surrender to the best within you and around you.
Let this good be your guiding principle, your North Star. Let it be what gets you out of bed in the morning, fills you, breathes you, animates you. Enjoy the contentment, relief, and sense of integrity that swell in your heart through living from and as this good. Let yourself know that you know what’s good. Feel yourself becoming more committed to this good. Feel yourself becoming this good.
As you like, repeat this process with other good things.
Love the wave! |
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Know someone who could give over to the good more often? |
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Share this Just One Thing practice with them! |
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NEW ON THE BEING WELL PODCAST |
The Freeze Response, Gifted Kid Syndrome, and BPD: July Mailbag |
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Dr. Rick and Forrest answer listener questions about perfectionism, performance anxiety, trauma, and relationships. They explore how early praise for being “gifted” can create a fear of failure and contribute to “failure to launch,” and share ways to shift from focusing on an idealized future to appreciating your actual self right now. They discuss learned helplessness, the freeze response, and practical ways to build agency and vitality to counter feelings of powerlessness. |
| Check out the Episode |
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NEW FROM THE WEDNESDAY MEDITATIONS + TALKS |
How to Find Peace in Impermanence |
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Last week I offered a live meditation on Releasing Anxiety, Feeling Alright Right Now, followed by a talk on How to Find Peace in Impermanence, and I hope you'll check it out.
If you haven't yet, sign up to join me every week for this free, live offering.
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| Check It Out |
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MORE GOOD STUFF |
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SCIENCE NEWS (VIEW ARCHIVE HERE)
Neuroscientists are finding that our brain doesn’t run out of memory like a computer; it can store vast amounts by spreading memories across neurons.
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FOR PARENTS
Keeping romantic love alive in the midst of raising kids and earning a living is one of the hardest things that anyone can do.
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POSITIVE NEUROPLASTICITY
PositiveNeuroplasticity.com provides resources and real-life accounts for using positive brain change in your everyday life. Classes and one-on-one counselling are also available to deepen your learning.
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FREE SUMMIT: RESET YOUR NERVOUS SYSTEM
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stuck in old patterns, the Reset Your Nervous System Super Conference offers powerful, science-based tools to help you calm your body, heal past pain, and feel more at home in yourself. With insights from leading experts in trauma, somatics, and neurobiology, you’ll explore practical ways to restore balance, build resilience, and nurture lasting inner peace.
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HAVE YOU READ IT YET? |
Resilient |
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Learn how to develop key inner strengths – like grit, gratitude, and compassion – to stay calm, confident, and happy no matter what life throws at you. Available in Hardcover, Paperback eBook, and Audiobook, wherever books are sold.
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WORDS OF WISDOM |
"Giving over to good means relaxing into, opening to, being buoyed and guided by things like your own naturally good heart, the impulse to take the high road, love, compassion, vitality, courage, the longing for justice, and the wisdom and support of good friends." |
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— RICK HANSON, PHD |
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JUST ONE THING (JOT) is the free newsletter that suggests a simple practice each week for more joy, more fulfilling relationships, and more peace of mind. A small thing repeated routinely adds up over time to produce big results.
Just one thing that could change your life.
(© Rick Hanson, 2024) |
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